In 1972, dad represented Great Britain in the Paralympics,
Winning gold in the 400 metres breast-stroke: category 'men with no pricks.'
Mum’s invited 80s tennis stars Bjorn Borg and Boris Becker
To play ‘mixed doubles’ (aka bogs ‘double decker’)
All hours of the day, every day of the week,
Blokes assaulting mum's shit-creek.
Mum's offering lifetime guarantees,
To all thick blokes, of bogs freebies.
Everyone's had a good look at dad's prick,
And unanimously agreed that it's not thick.
No bloke has ever served a sentence,
For behaviours relating to mum's poo entrance.
I have to dispute the claim 'You Can't Get Quicker Than a Quick-Fit Fitter,'
Your mum sucks off up to 60 blokes an hour (and takes 30 up the shitter).
Bogs-blokes are entrusted,
To get mum's arsehole busted.
In her distinguished career, mum has gone a long way to debunk,
The myth that there is a limit to ingesting spunk.
Dad's latest excuse,
Is that he "just really likes child abuse".
