Staple my balls to my face.
Dad's public expression of disapproval regarding the term 'spastic' is ballsy
Given his sexual proclivity for kids with cerebral palsy
Brown paper bag dad stashes new porn with his hoard,
Problematic penis though;
Cock stink - 'cheeseboard'.
Big gents-bloke going at it from a particularly tight angle,
Causing further destruction to mum's 'pubic triangle.'
Bedsit dad spending his evening solo,
Except for the company of mildly lubed Polo.
Buy me a very uncomfortable, very unsexy bra and then find my obvious distaste at wearing it sexy
The only experience mum's had of being properly "full,"
Was during a tour of the public conveniences of Kaboul.
After a hard day's bogs-work
When Mum starts to twerk
The resultant torrent of dislodged spunk sends the blokes berserk
At Bogs-Slut Conference '24, mum's keynote speech extols the virtues,
Of willy-doubles, otherwise known as "taking a fews."
It's a cruel world, and there's no reprieve, from your mum's abysmal wizard's sleeve.
