Fact:
Mum's arsehole can no longer fully contract.
Bogs-data remains heavily classified,
As to how often and how much, mum's poo-pipe has been cream-pied.
Mum's loves a few dollops of Piri Piri mayo,
All over her perineum (splay-o).
From Clint Boon of 'Inspiral Carpets' to all of 'Northern Uproar'
From the bassist out of 'World of Twist' to the drummer out of 'Mega City Four'
There isn't a 90s mancunian indie band member who hasn't kicked in your mum's mega-shitty back door.
(Even Bonehead made it raw)
What's that horrid cunt-stench wafting?
Mum's back on the game in the gents-bogs-lofting.
Mumโs ordered โa lot of BumSexโ
Delivered by a succession of blokes from FedEx
Bish, bash, bosh,
Mum's bum 'a slosh.'
put any future possibility of sexual pleasure out of reach,
by completely dissolving my genitals in bleach.
Mum: still accommodating more blokes despite bum status: full
Dad: crashed the "Willy Size Database" (Length = NULL)
In the gents, there's no hard and fast rules,
Mum simply wants loose and fast stools.