Mum and the blokes have come to terms:
1lb of dogshit- 1 bumful of sperms.
There is a sombre mood,
As blokes gather reflectively around the area from which mum once pooed.
There's a whole host of things wrong, with your father's little putty-prong
(#1: not long).
The primary school governors at first thought it rather spurious,
That dad had completed the 'sexual persuasion' question in his application for Toilet Janitor as "child-curious."
Mum’s recruited many, many men
In order to do to her arsehole what the RAF in 1945 did to Dresden
Dad believes it's trendy,
To dress, behave and talk, all "sex-offendy."
Mum's never recognised any downside,
To her being continuously and ruinously "brown-eyed."
Dad listens to a lot of Enya,
Which is common amongst child sex offenders.
Big Bloke Bozza’s causing uproarious bog-scandal
By claiming that his new surgically enhanced willy is ‘too big for Mum to handle’
To get to your mum in the gents it took the Bum-Doctors hours,
I'll visit the hospital tomorrow, y'know, to take her some flowers.
