During summer, dad likes to visit famous British landmarks and places,
And spoil them for everyone else by publically passing urine and feces.
Mum’s not one for online dating
Preferring the traditional ‘being pissed and shat on through a rusty iron grating’
Uh oh, dad with weird vids (slow-mo),
Attempting arousal via the prominent nipples of former athlete: Flo Jo.
Like a black hole's gravity,
Blokes are pulled in to mum's brown cavity.
Mum's horror-box: two planets colliding in a sack,
the middle gets bigger
(increasingly slack).
Mum reneged on her marriage nuptials,
Not long after her wedding ceremony, in the gents toilet cubicles.
The end of year lists are in
Dad’s odds-on favourite to win
The category: “thin”.
Mum is almost part of the bogs-furniture
Inasmuch as blokes regularly piss, shit and sperm on her
Busy night for mum in gents with blokes, seems like there's an awful lot of 'em,
With the willy-doublies she's taking on, it's goodbye perineum!
Mum's cracking open the Asti Spumante
To celebrate the return of the legendary 'Signor Willy-Elephanty'
