Different shaped arseholes.
The morning after a bogs-shift, mum's lucky if her anus,
Returns to size-setting "open tub of humus."
Mum has a bogs special VIP area,
For blokes who are "sized that little bit scarier."
Tiny, dry, crumbly and entirely lacking in 'meat'
Dad's 'sausage roll' isn't anyone's idea of a treat
Your mum has a certain air of defiance,
Around how (sexually, with big blokes) she's defied medical science.
'Mater's in the billiard room having a round of anahl with the gardener'
Mum despises small talk or social mingling,
She just wants a proper "tube of Pringling."
It's a completely proven scientific fact, that your father (by blokes) has a ruined shit-tract.
Big Bob strolls in the bog, announcing he's going to "middle of next week,"
Mum's already cowering poo-beak.
Mum charges Polish blokes one zloty
For unlimited access to her botty-slotty.
Mum's left in pieces,
If there wasn't enough dogs feaces.