Different shaped arseholes.
Dad's left pissing out of his arse and mum's left shitting out of her twat because some bloke pissed up dad's arse and some bloke shat up mum's cunt.
You'll need to employ an aggressive style,
To negotiate past the back-end piles.
One area dad has been the best,
Is number of times arrested undressed.
At this point it’s only Mum’s tough, leathery flaps
Preventing complete vagino-anal prolapse
Mum's knackered old poo-flower,
Has extraordinary natural healing power.
Dad's opted for knicker style: crotchless,
Which, when you think about it for him, is completely pointless.
In a tribute to the late Prince Consort, this week
Mum's offering 99 blokes the chance to 'Phil the Greek'
Dad's watching his VHS copy of Sister Act,
Whilst performing a truly disgusting solo sex-act.
Top of dad's wish list ,
Covered in piss and shit.
In the playground today, dad further displayed his credentials,
As being both a danger to children and having very small genitals.
