Staple my balls to my face.
With more passengers than Bridgnorth's lenticular railway,
your mum's been ridden by Bryan Cant and the whole cast of Playaway.
Dad's the main story on Bad Penis Report:
An in-depth feature on how it's weird and short.
In a tribute to ‘Titanic’ mum’s urging blokes to ‘frost me like one of your French fancy cakes’
Kicking off an unusually spirited round of bukkakes
After a hard day's bogs-work
When Mum starts to twerk
The resultant torrent of dislodged spunk sends the blokes berserk
i'll make it a regular event,
to violate your anus in my tent.
(canvas friction until i'm spent)
Mum's getting nailed by deceased 80s male singles tennis sensation, Robert Abdesselam,
And judging by the horrendous genital friction buildup, she's going to need twat balm.
Dad's nonce-foibles,
Include interfering with little boys' bumholes, willies and balls.
Bogs-docs remain puzzled,
As to the sheer volume of spunk mum's guzzled.
Dad’s having one of his hours-long ‘goons’
In the bushes watching kids watching Saturday morning cartoons.
Mum has a firm prediction:
Dad will fail to gain an erection.
