Objectification of mum: cunt / arse, which one?
Most blokes go for the former.
Your dad? Fuck knows really, he's just a 'sexual bench-warmer.'
Mum's still caked in quite a lot of dog crap,
So she's waving the blokes in for an extra "victory lap".
Vets,
Sucking and fucking pets.
Mum considers ‘banal’
Anything less than ‘triple anal’
Mum allowing vaginal?
Unimaginable.
It's prize night at the local knocking shop, 'Slut, Bang, Wallop!'
Your Mum's come first in the section, 'Smelling like a Scallop'.
Dad's advertising lessons in striptease,
For the under threes,
(and is shocked at the lack of registerees).
Stalwart bogsmen continually impressed with how mum remains impassive
Even while taking on willies the zookeepers at Whipsnade would consider ‘absolutely massive’
Nothing will be left to chance,
We'll call a fucking ambulance.
Bogs-blokes playing a kind of "Willy MarioKart,"
On circuits up the areas from which mum fart.
