Was your dad attempting to communicate with us?
It's noticeable there are very specific areas of the bedroom not covered in shit, piss or puss.
Publish a 1000 page, densely printed leather-bound tome called ‘How to wipe your bottom, for people who don’t know how to wipe their own bottom’ and then go around leaving a copy in a drawer, Gideon bible style, in every place I visit.
Top Cock-Docs are highly circumspect,
Around if dad's willy has ever, or indeed will ever, erect.
Dad’s having a fit of pique
After being described accurately as ‘small of prick’
Dad realises an existential junction,
Has arrived with his erectile dysfunction.
After a particularly heavy night in the bogs, there seems to be a worrying amount of 'give,'
In what (I can only now tentatively describe), as your mum's 'shit-sieve.'
Mum's fartare,
Looks like steak tartare.
Dad's "on notice",
For Indecently Exposed Scrotis.
Mum's throwing a "no loads barred" bogs bumsex party,
Guest of honour? Yep, it's Saikat Chakrabarti.
