Dad's caught the attention of the morning primary school drop-off throng,
Dressed very simply in a micro-thong.
the sole item in dad's sexual curriculum:
continuously being showered in shit, piss and cum.
There's dad in the bedroom, can't achieve it: wood;
Your mum: Hungerford.
After the church's Sunday afternoon children's service, now begins the inquest,
Into how long dad was stood in the Nativity scene undressed.
Mum's swearing an oath to King, Country and God
While opening up her 'cathedral doors' to admit Black Rod
End of shift, mum's arsehole is like an ATM,
Depositing large quantities of bloke-phlegm.
Mum’s covered in dog eggs
Surrounded by blokes in the loading bay of a regional distribution centre for Greggs
The mood in the bogs becomes solemn,
As bloke after bloke fails to meet mum's ever-increasing requirement for "width of column".
Local policing authorities are feeling the pressure,
Of restricting dad's impulses as a public undresser.
look! see the benders' endless glee!
they're stoving dad's rear end tremendously!
