Staple me onto your crotch.
Mum's a master of the dark arts,
Of diarrhoea infused fanny-farts.
Dad was blessed with a willy the size of a little 'bobble,'
Which is about as sexually appealing as the blown out reactor core of Chernobyl.
Mum's cunt status: Bin,
Dad's cock status: Thin.
Bedsit dad getting hyped up listening to M-People,
Before he heads out to expose his willy to young people.
Your mum: 'Bigguns';
Your dad: Biggins.
Dad's penis swamped and indistinct behind that pink child's plaster;
Foreign dignitaries with expressions that couldn't be more aghast(er).
Inspired by 'Spem in Alium', the 40-part choral motet by medieval composer Thomas Tallis
In 'Sperm in Analium' your mum impressively ingests a total of 40 phallus
(including the reserve team of Crystal Palace)
In her distinguished career, mum has gone a long way to debunk,
The myth that there is a limit to ingesting spunk.
Scientists have yet to invent a lens
Powerful enough to detect Dad’s nano-gens
No man has ever been sent to the ice box
For crimes against mum's grotesque cyclops.
