Hardly anything there at all.
Dad's putting "Gorillas in the Mist",
On his "great wank list".
Check dad's y-fronts: yep, milmed;
And his camera roll? Yep, loads of kids surreptitiously filmed.
(Mum to 'peloton' of blokes behind her : "FASTER")
Mum pictures tennis star Stan Wawrinka
While big blokes get their first serve in her "stinker".
No need for flowers, cards or chocolates,
All mum wants on Mother's Day is blokes in all her slots.
Every year mum finds herself offering the same "Happy New Year,"
To bogs-blokes, as she's matted with spunk, and grinning ear to ear.
Dad's checking 9/11 freefall trade centre footage, looking for 'squibs';
Although instead of really looking, he's thinking about kids.
One bloke's offering his hand in marriage,
To mum's general undercarriage.
Mum's holding the annual Bogs Easter Egg Hunt,
Up the cavernous labyrinth of her cunt!!
Dad finds the local primary "sexually electric";
Good thing his willy's chronically "non-erectic".