Mum’s started a Kickstarter
Aim: “build a machine to completely destroy my farter”
Come sunshine or rain,
Pleasure or pain,
I'll always hold disdain for your dad's main vein.
Mum's arsehole always stands out in a crowd,
It's the one which clearly looks like it's spent 50 years being ploughed.
Dad's nonce reputation: pretty fair,
As are the rumours he's "got fuck-all down there".
Mum's listening to 'All the Young Dudes' by Mott the Hoople
(an appropriate soundtrack to a willy-quadruple)
There's no part of your mum that could be termed 'uncharted territory',
Your dad in 'Bad Cock Weekly': He's the lead story.
It’s a mystery as to why Dad didn’t expect the council to reject a
proposal he made: appoint him as ‘Primary Schools Willy Inspector’
Tonight, mum's planned,
To be fully "manned."
Your mother always brought to her porno films, certain 'Pinteresque' qualities,
Your father was inspired (sexually) from the work of the Chucklebrothers on CBeebies.
Proof that dad's not entirely lost his bum-looks,
He's just been fucked by ex-1980's Spurs striker-now-BBC-football-pundit-psuedo-serious-inferiority-complex-ridden-and-all-round-weirdo-twat, Garth Crooks!
