Every one of Dad’s days begins
With hours of doomed research on how to ‘cure the willy-thins’
Dad’s once again trying to lure kids into his van with a ‘sweetie trail’
Luckily for them he will of course at the crucial moment genitally ‘fail’
Dad, most notorious of the "pants-round-ankles park-waddlers",
Now seeking fresh investment for "OnlyFans for toddlers".
Mum fucked Buddy the Elf,
And was left with extremely poor sexual health.
Newly recruited bog-blokes are encouraged not to tarry
As it prevents other blokes from giving it to Mum ‘up the Gary’
Even experienced bogs-blokes are often left gobsmacked,
At the sheer volume of mum's fudge that's been packed.
People often think mum's wearing fake tan,
But actually it's smeared poo from bogs-man.
Bogs crimes against mum considered heinous,
But at least she's receiving loads that are proteinous.
There is very little left intact,
Your anal canal has been thoroughly attacked.
Mum's embracing the notion of a circular economy,
By viewing the bogs-bloke's spunk she's consumed, as dietary.
