Staple my balls to my face.
Of servicing big blokes, mum is definitely guilty.
Dad's crimes? Willy small, weird and "wilty".
Dad didn't get very far on Dragon's Den,
With his idea for 'Transparent Adult Nappies for Peodophile Men.'
Dad's known,
As the man who's willy's never grown.
Mum's a glutton
For bog-blokes hammering her bum-button
Dad's been caught "upskirting" and "downblousing,"
In and around vulnerable young people's housing.
In the 90's it all got rather surreal,
When your mum and dad were both fucking Eastenders' Ian Beale.
It's amazing, how blokes are prepared to take their chances,
When mum has such atrocious twat and arse flatulences.
Mum's facilitating a masterclass,
On how to take it very hard, up the arse.
It's always incredibly hit or miss,
Whether or not you locate the clitoris.
Bogs? 30+ blokes/mum, good bum-bleed going.
Park? Dad 30th arrest with "little reed" showing.
