It's weird how mum only gets ploughed,
By the extremely well endowed.
At the 'New Twat Clinic' mum pointed at the photo in the magazine,
An optimistic choice: "papercut fanny, status: pristine. "
Mum sometimes gets the willies
That one day she might not get the willies
The expression, "you catch more flies with honey",
Doesn't seem to apply at all to the swarm of blokes buzzing around mum's rank cunny.
Dad's grown bored of pretend-fucks with used jam-rags,
He's taken to prodding his nob in old granny's colostomy bags.
After a horrific arse mauling from actor, Tim Roth,
It's pants back on for dad, though he's still touching cloth.
So entrenched are mum's pubic lices,
That, they too, are having mid-life crises.
Mum's such a bleater,
If she's not getting properly shafted up her old poo-heater.
Your mums excitement got ahead of her,
she force-fed your dad her soggy wheatabix enema.
