People often think mum's wearing fake tan,
But actually it's smeared poo from bogs-man.
Like some ancient, mystical fuck-druid,
Mum has a supernatural gift for draining blokes of fluid.
Mum just tries to stay 'zen,'
When she's taking on lots and lots of men.
Mum playing anal Russian Roulette, variety of diseases gained: Misc.
Oh and what's her favourite sex-game? Yep, it's 'clitorisk.'
(to tune of ABBA's The Winner Takes It All)
'Your mummy takes them all,
Your daddy's willy: small,
Together in the gents,
Different kinds of sex-offence.'
It's almost as if mum's designed,
To be fucked from behind.
I was forced to accept my fate,
as I was enveloped by your mother's horror-grate.
Rewrite all famous songs featuring the word ‘kiss’ but replacing it with the word ‘piss’
Mum's got them 'orrid tits that sag,
An's fucked rahnd the bogs like an old doll (rag).
Concerned Mum might be on her last legs
Blokes rush to crack open the restorative vat of dog-eggs.
