These days, bogs-blokes are struggling to comprehend,
Where mum's twat starts and where arsehole ends.
Dad: barely existing on society's margins
Mum: loudly insisting on society's large 'uns
Mum is Master of the Dark Arts,
In simultaneous fanny and arse farts.
Pre-shift and mum's got nothing to lose,
But her poos.
Topical cream on vaginal sores,
praying for the menopause.
Publish a 1000 page, densely printed leather-bound tome called ‘How to wipe your bottom, for people who don’t know how to wipe their own bottom’ and then go around leaving a copy in a drawer, Gideon bible style, in every place I visit.
Dad's been left in a competitive rage,
After entering the 'Prick-Tennis' Championships and getting knocked out at the semi-stage.
Author school text books
About bloke's 'poo-nooks'.
It's International World Thin Willy Awareness Day,
And spokesman dad's doing the morning interview rounds, with plenty of personal things to say.
No bogs-bloke has ever complained
Of leaving Mum’s sessions with balls undrained.
