Dad's set up a really abysmal OnlyFans
Centred around his disappoint-a-glans.
Bogs-blokes know its a total lotto,
If they'll get out alive from mum's Xmas grotto.
Let's break out the bubbly!
Your mum's up for a willy-doubley!!
By every conceivable metric,
Dad has a useless and small prick.
Mum's having her tits cubed by pound for pound greatest boxer, Manny Pacquiao;
Leading to her busted bum ending up strewn all over a square mile of Slough.
Trying to do mum, but not "up the posh"?
Won't wash.
I've consulted Chinese Sages;
Your blighted arsehole was fucked for ages.
Dad's always got some new plan hatching,
For snaring those with no pubic thatching.
Bum-porn fans become all misty-eyed,
At talk of mum's 1972 breakthrough "I've Been Brown Clown-Pied."
Don't hate me,
but I've got scrapie.