Mum’s being nailed in the stonker
By Belgium and Aston Villa midfielder Leander Dendoncker
Dad's in the 'spoons bogs with blokes taking speed;
Arse lips splayed plus prick-status: millipede.
Dad's been going round merrily telling everyone he'd managed an erection,
Sad really, his clinging to these Walter Mitty-style fictions.
Dad’s under surveillance by Special Branch
Because he’s been showing kids his ‘special branch’
The evidence starkly clear, on library microfiche;
Dad's abysmal flop-on has always stunk of quiche.
The most striking characteristic of dad's genital,
Is that it is very smal.
Your genitals are in entirely the wrong place
Bogs-blokes have a lively WhatsApp group,
Discussing the dilation status of mum's crap-hoop.
tend towards feelings of sadness and loss, gather together (male group penis toss)
Dad looks down between his legs, forlorn,
At his knackered, tiny, dusty acorn.
