Mum's cunt: Not alkaline, but acid,
Dad's prick: Incredibly shit, and flacid.
Mum can be accused of micromanagin'
The process of having her back doors stoved in.
Your dad was quite daring,
enveloping that wrongbox ballbearing
(everyone in Asda: staring).
mum's off to get a "tramp stamp"
to celebrate once again being named "Gents' Fuck Champ"
for sexually accommodating fifteen blokes and a standard lamp.
The crowds at the paralympics cheered and clapped,
As dad picked up yet another gold in the category "willy handicapped."
Dad's trying to pull a fast one,
In telling blokes he's got a 'vast one'.
Dad's sexual performance is a real shit shower;
Mum's sexual preference is a real shit shower.
Mum has a far from elite,
Poo-pleat.
Dad doesn't understand the "birds and the bees,"
He's only interested in the under threes.
The style and size of dad's bathing thong,
Was described by other public swimming pool users as "wrong."
