Even your mum has felt the economic slump,
She's doing 50% off the normal tuppenny hump.
Dad: defeated softcock wanking in the larder
Mum: enjoying several large ‘penis-colada’s’
Mum's vast slop pit?
Bloke, finally: 'stop it'.
Dad's in a sex shop 'on the rob',
mum's in the gents again,
'on the blob'.
Not-actually-dying Dad demanding his ‘palliative care’
Be provided by ‘pale young boys with no pubic hair’
Dad’s wandering the earth
In search of increased girth
Mum sometimes adopts a pose akin to Rodin's "The Thinker"
When considering how to maximise her amount of bloke rod in the stinker
I've developed a reading of the Koran,
That involves having to repeatedly fuck your old gran.
Spend, not ‘a penny’ but ‘five quid’
Dad's queing at the council offices seeking planning permission,
for a thimble-sized horror-bin to house his feeble emission.