Dad shows no sign of abating,
His desire to hang around schools, masturbating.
Dad’s hardon
Is the colour and dimensions of a single Lidl bacon lardon
They say "any port in a storm" for the randy farm-laboured,
Maybe not though, when you see mum's arsehole "Pearl Harboured."
Dad's willy doppelganger,
Is the end of a wire coat hanger.
Dad mistakenly believes it to be his prerogative,
To make the local playground "sex-positive".
Mum will often refer to the bogs hive mind,
For innovation in being screwed in the behind.
Mum can handle multiple penis,
With the grace and skill of a concert pianist.
Oh wow, tonight for mum's bum, it really is 'Cliffs of Dover,'
Last night's all-night enormo-farmhand bogs-party has gone and carried over!
It's almost complete (dad's penile metamorphosis), but the surgeons are baffled;
It doesn't even piss.
Perhaps we should show your father just a little respect,
It's not entirely his fault his penis can't erect.
