Different shaped arseholes.
Dad feels that his chances of sexual activity might improve,
If his genitals weren't "Ken doll smooth."
Dad's attempt to "disrupt the sex toy industry",
Not going well: microwaveable sex bum suspiciously "Findus-y".
Mum's not that fussed about tinsel and baubles,
She's focused, as usual, on dogshit and bumfulls.
Dad's never played second fiddle,
To anyone else who kiddie fiddle.
Oh no!
Look away!
it's a 'movie-spoiler',
this advert shows your dad getting fucked by a steam boiler.
All dad's attempts at sexual intimacy have been utterly slapstick,
And that's before we factor in a prick that's so unthick.
Even using the most sensitive detectors available at CERN
Dad’s willy is still ‘impossible to discern’
Mum's twat may no longer have much "grabbage,"
But she does have impressive plumes of "cunt-cabbage."
Mum's got some nasty looking bum blisters,
From entertaining too many Big Misters.
Mum’s ordered ‘a lot of BumSex’
Delivered by a succession of blokes from FedEx
