Dad gets the heebie-jeebies,
If he hasn't had his daily quota of CBeebies.
Mum just tries to stay 'zen,'
When she's taking on lots and lots of men.
Dad's the world-leading expert in,
Learner bra fastenin'
Dad's discovered a state of domestic, marital bliss,
With a Tesco carrier bag of his piss.
Mum goes proper nutter,
If not completely covered in dog-butter.
Mum: chasmal shit cabinet like a fucked Dim Sum;
Dad?
Ladbrokes, Wrexham.
Dad favours,
The pre-shavers.
On the nonce scale, dad's a rock solid 10,
But willy a 0, compared to all other men.
Analyzing the data in dad's sex-portfolio,
100% of acts were performed solo.
Mum's seeking to reclaim the narrative,
In the debate around her crapper any longer having any 'give.'
