Your mum's in constant demand in the train station bogs,
despite her face resembling 'a box of frogs'.
Outside the bogs, blokes are 'Christmas caroling,'
Inside the bogs, mum's receiving a festive wheelbarrowing.
Dad's subjecting himself to some really unkind self-talk,
Concerning the appalling condition of his fuck-stalk.
Bedsit Dad listening to Alanis Morissette,
Thinking "isn't it ironic I've not had sex yet."
Even seasoned bogs-blokes can find it distressing,
Seeing mum hurriedly arrive at the gents, already undressing.
Dad's loitering,
Around where children are toileting.
The bogs often sound like an episode of TVs "Kick Start,"
When mum unleashes a loud and aggressive fanny fart.
On Sundays, Mum does a spot of dogging
As a break from 6 consecutive days of bogging
Dad’s method of noncing is mostly intellectual
Due to his willy being completely ineffectual
Queues outside the gents bogs have decreased since,
Mum was forced to have her annual anal rinse.
