Mum whistling Tina Turner's 'What's Love Got To Do With It?'
Whilst being unceremoniously caked in various blokes shit.
Dad's amassed quite a collection of "specialist books",
While giving countless kids "inappropriate looks".
Dad’s trouser snake gets hard (but remains spindly)
When he thinks about the crimes of Ian Brady and Myra Hindley
Let's not get into semantics,
But mum's 'privates' are more 'publics.'
Blokes knobbing mum "up where it's shitty",
Sad bedsit dad "wanking on mcvitie".
Mum always gets "bummed something terrible",
By blokes that are low-functioning and non-verbal.
This website is giving me a 404 error right now
(I want to wank to kids, but I'm not sure how)
Even when dad's sleeping or at rest,
He's still classified as a 'dormant sex pest.'
Your father's wrong-shlong fails to fatten,
unless placed directly in front of the underwear section of catalogue: Gratton.
Dad showed his willy to Liz Truss,
On the back of a buss.
