Mum's at Dignitas;
getting fucked in the ass.
Mum's year in review?
Poo-screw after poo-screw after poo-screw.
Over the years your mum's taken in quite a few male lodgers,
She's also taken a few cocks up the arse (by blokes known as 'Jammy-Rag Dodgers').
In the bogs, normal service resumes,
With blokes running through mum's twat and poo-flumes,
And by the end of the shift, her anus,
Resembles an open-topped Fray Bentos.
There's your mum: tits in the blender,
Dad's in the betting shop (recently changed gender).
Mum: has spastic colon;
Dad: In spastic's colon.
Mum's oddly soupy vag not 'Jif Lemon Fresh'
Smells like amonia from a sewer in Marrakesh.
Dad's been preparing Sunday dinner all week,
It's a lovely bum-induced 'bubble and squeak!'
Dad heading to the playground, to try on his luck,
And offer parents a tenner, to lend him their kids for a fuck.
Mum's seeking to ensure the rumours are quashed,
That her crapper has been irreparably boshed.
