Mum fucked Buddy the Elf,
And was left with extremely poor sexual health.
It's not clear where dad's keeping the Fun Size Snickers,
He's offering to kids in the playground, dressed only in bra and knickers.
After ninety blokes, mum needs some kind of spunk-doulah;
While dad's working on penis-puppetry to try to pull a pre-schooler.
Launch an internet hot piss streaming service
Mum: the opposite of a ‘cock blocker’
Dad: penis resembles a doll’s house door knocker
Mum's in the pantry, cooking up a storm,
the neighbours thought it odd: stuffed crust from bin-man horn.
Bedsit dad listening to Tanita Tikaram,
With a couple of fingers up his bum.
if your mum laid every cock she's had end to end,
they'd reach from John O'Groats to Lands End.
Mum’s post-bogs bum annihilation state
Means her stools are a hitherto unheard of Bristol type 8
Mum's poo-centre,
Remains extremely popular.
