There is a sense of mounting distress,
As dad, once again in the playground, begins to undress.
Mum came up with a very quickly discarded plan,
That involved the crazy idea of her entertaining slightly thinner man.
Eminent arse-archaeologists,
Claim mum's bum structure no longer exists.
it really can't be overstated
how many times your mum has been penetrated.
Mum’s been known to eject
From the bogs any bloke less than fully erect
Your mum couldn't control her continual friggings,
last week when we all met Christopher Biggins.
Mum's been into urine gargling,
Since the days of Yuri Gagarin.
Qt the end of the night, when the landlord calls "time",
Every bloke's popped in the gents to do mum a bum-crime.
Dad's unable to find a willing sexual partner;
But finds toddlers a reliable penis hardener.
Bogs-blokes know they need to up their level,
For any chance of winning mum's "gold medal."
