Re-chart my hairy territory
Dad has very poor social and emotional intellect,
And a willy that simply will not erect.
Mum's had many, many a casual lover,
And now it's now hard to tell one part of her nether region from another.
Dad shops in Waitrose,
He's amongst other flowery-poof homo's.
Mum fondly remembers Russian biker Vlad "The Impaler,"
And how she had to intermittently reach for her inhaler.
What's the dribbling from Dad's aching chasm?
It's 'Ghostbusters' merchandise: protoplasm.
Mum is a legendary bogs tour de force,
At being being done with force in the back doors.
Dad’s bought a stripper pole
Made for a 3-year old
Mum's in the bogs, "taking a dive":
Big Bloke XI playing a "back five".
Mum reneged on her marriage nuptials,
Not long after her wedding ceremony, in the gents toilet cubicles.
Dad's scouring through all the black friday deals,
Search terms? "Full sex with toddler for reals"
