Mum's giving something back and doing a charity bum-fun fuck in the gents tonight for free,
3 quid on the door (all proceeds go to the Arsehole Unit at the QMC).
((please give generously)).
It's thin and it's shit, but it is immensely strong;
It's dad's poorly retrofitted carbon nanorod dong.
Analyzing the data in dad's sex-portfolio,
100% of acts were performed solo.
In the gents, blokes have developed a one-way system,
Taking them directly to mum, who's bent over the cistern.
As that big gents-bloke delivered his vast load into the arsehole of your mother,
Several onlookers mentioned you could see her internal organs shudder.
Dad's hanging around at the Chiswick fruit and veg stall,
popping cock out of clementines to universal 'appall'.
Mum wears a perma-frown,
Due to too much action up the "brown."
Dad's still listening to Mumford and Sons,
Because he's got one of the world's littlest ones.
Make a really big fuss
About the state of my anus
Even though his penis has been medically proven as inneffectual,
Dad's still classified by police as a 'dangerous homosexual.'
