The covering of dad's groin is, at best, spartan,
As he makes his way to kindergarten.
Dad heading to the playground, to try on his luck,
And offer parents a tenner, to lend him their kids for a fuck.
Dad’s having a hard time finding sponsors
For his new podcast ‘by and for nonces’
Mum fails to exercise discretion, she's clueless as to what that's about,
She's 'brown-bread fucked' (like Hovis), 'wi' nowt taken out'.
Last night, there was a lot of bogs-blokes muttering,
After mum inconceivably chose to go buttering,
Her poo-guttering.
Dad employs kidology,
To deflect from his interest in "kid-ogling." ?
Mum’s not really one for ‘small talk’
But she is one for ‘large pork’.
Check dad's y-fronts: yep, milmed;
And his camera roll? Yep, loads of kids surreptitiously filmed.
Can of 'brew', fag in mouth, raggy old string vest. None of these in themselves are a crime but your Dad is also a sex pest.
To coincide with the release of the new Tom Cruise: Mission Impossible,
Comes a re-release of the infamous Mum's Poos: Mission Unsloppable.
