Dad feels really awkward,
About his miniature pork-sword.
Mum's not wary of 'Greeks bearing gifts'
(Especially those with capacity to cause serious anal rifts)
It's weird how mum only gets ploughed,
By the extremely well endowed.
Endlessly refine my great bum-lineage
Until it resembles red/brown spineach.
Dad sways into the local bookies to lay a bet,
On how he's wearing the skimpiest bra and knicker set yet.
The state of mum's shitter is far from impeccable,
But it remains, to bogs-blokes, eminently fuckable.
this morning, mum's having a bit of trouble sitting down.
she shouldn't have let Dennis Taylor use a real snooker cue to pot the proverbial brown.
When will dad finally learn,
That everyone he shows his prick to thinks it resembles a chemical burn?
Dad's discovered, to his chagrin,
That not even anorexic women,
Appreciate a man's penis being thin.
For the first time ever, Mum's described her bum as 'a bit sore'
Although horrified onlookers described it more akin to the state of Warsaw
In October 1944
