All her life, mum's been in intensive training,
So one day, she can take an almighty main-veining.
Mum's swearing an oath to King, Country and God
While opening up her 'cathedral doors' to admit Black Rod
The hemorrhoids protruding from mum's arsehole,
Are the size of profiteroles.
Available now on DVD!
Your Mum's, 'Outdoor wee wee 3'.
It's Christmas Day, and mum's not in the kitchen stuffing the turkey,
She's still in the bogs, getting stuffed by huge blokes from Turkey.
Your mum: front cover of 'Tits That Sag'
Your dad: front cover of 'Blokes in Drag'
Forlorn Dad waiting outside the bogs while Mum hands out the prizes
To the 100 blokes with the biggest willy sizes
Jack be nimble, Jack me quick,
Jack fuck mum with a prick that's thick.
Mum’s offering men an alternative to the Sony PlayStation
Namely ‘enthusiastic, protracted anal penetration’
Mum accepts having internationally renowned bum-docs on speed-dial is par for the course,
When being one of the world's filthiest and most sexually degraded bogs bum-whores.
