Be the prison sex-raffle prize.
Dad's feeling thoroughly chastised
After being caught exaggerating the size of his gens (describing them as 'thimble-sized');
Last night mum out on the town,
What happened?
Lots of blokes potted the brown,
Outcome?
She's finding it extremely difficult to sit down.
Dad's long-term and very keen interest in junior level tennis,
Is known by the police and understood to be a borderline sex-offennis.
Dad's got the tweezers out to watch mum's film 'Cheap Sex-Tramp,'
Oh-no though, he's pulled up with a severe bout of wanker's cramp.
Check dad's y-fronts: yep, milmed;
And his camera roll? Yep, loads of kids surreptitiously filmed.
Regrettably, in the contract signed, dad's boss failed to stipulate,
that it's inappropriate to fist oneself, and continually masturbate.
piss in my mouth,
while singing any of the several hits of nineties popsters, The Beautiful South.
Write me loquacious, tender love letters that absolutely stink of really old, brown piss
One doesn't need to be Nostradamus,
To foresee a bleak future for mum's anus.
I find it quite threatening;
Your mum's arse, beckoning.
